Mommy Camp!

So I shared in my last post about the conversation that TJ, Jackie and I had about what we would do with $100,000 if we could do anything.

My answer was a Mommy Camp.

A place where mom's can go for a weekend to get away.  To sleep, to vent, to cry, to yell, to be encouraged, to be challenged, to eat, to relax, to breath, to focus, to laugh, and laugh some more, to play games, and converse with other moms who "get it".

Have you ever been having a crappy day and you ran into a really good friend or a complete stranger and all you had to do was look at each other and you just knew that they understood.  The "I've been there!" look but oozing with compassion.  Then there are times, ok maybe many times, when you meet the glance of a good friend or a complete stranger and you get the look of judgement.  No thank you!  I can't stand that. 

There is nothing more refreshing to my soul than empathy.  

Empathy: the power of understanding and imaginatively entering into another person's feelings.

And nothing more distasteful to me than someone who is NOT empathetic.  This very issue is an on going conversation in our house and is often my greatest frustration in relationships with people.

Let me give some examples.  Here is the common one between TJ and I (Love you honey!) and I imagine between a lot of stay at home moms and their spouse.  I will begin to share how hard it is to manage all the things I have to manage through out the day such as; getting all the kids up, dressed, fed, and out the door in the morning, homeschool, cleaning the house, planning and cooking meals 3 TIMES A DAY (sorry, had to shout) taking the kids to long appointments that are emotionally or physically demanding, homework, running errands with three kids in tow and on and on.  He will listen and then proceed to tell me what he would do if he were in my shoes.  Makes me mad every time.  EVERY TIME. And our conversation almost always ends in me saying, "can you just admit that this is really hard and sucks sometimes!? That's all I want.  Some empathy!"

Can you relate?

Here is another example.  I am dropping the girls off at school and it is a miracle I even got the kids to school because the whole morning has been a fight and we are all grumpy about it.  I chose my battles that morning and making my four year old get dressed, brush her hair, and put on shoes was not a battle I fought and won.  She doesn't have school this day so I don't care.  We show up at school and she is still crying from being an EMOTIONAL FOUR YEAR OLD and I throw her over my shoulder wrapped in her blankey and proceed to check Carly in.  There will inevitably be a mom or two who have one kid and they are always showered and looking cute who will give me a look as if to say, "what kind of mom are you?  Is it really that hard to get your kid dressed?" ( I will keep my thoughts to myself as to what I want to say to "those" people.  HA.  And in their defense, they have issues too.)  But then you catch the eye of a mom who just gets it.  And it is like you can take a deep breath and laugh.  And she may say something like, "oh boy, been there! Hang in there mom, keep thinking about bed time".

I just love those women.  No, really, I do.  I adore their spirit, and how comfortable they are to be themselves and authentic.  They know they are not perfect and they are ok with that.

All this lead me to Mommy Camp.  I wanted a place where mom's could yell, "YES! IT REALLY IS THAT HARD!"  Because you know what, it is.  Being a mom is hard.  Being a mom to multiple kids is hard.  Being a mom to multiple kids with issues or difficulties is hard.  Really stinkin' hard!  And I think us mom's in this caterogy want to know we are not alone.

We want empathy.  And honesty.  AND ENCOURAGEMENT.  We also want a place to breath because so often we are tense or we go go go and never stop to deal with the fact that we are depressed, overwhelmed, sad, angry, alone, unhappy, tired, burnt out, and disappointed.

All moms need a place where they can retreat.  But...my heart is for the ones who struggle with the words above on a regular basis.  They need a place where they can walk in the door or into the conversation and be greeted with the look.  The look of empathy.  The look that says, "I get it, and we are going to make it!"

Mommy Camp!

More coming on this idea in another post because believe you me, the dream is a brewing!

Hugs to you moms reading this!  You are awesome!

Birthday Eve

I have gotten a bit behind on this here blog.  Been processing some ideas, husband was out of town, and now I am getting over being sick.  Usually happens when TJ goes out of town because I never sleep well (or really at all) when my protector is gone.  I know, I have fear issues.  I am working on that.

The other reason I am behind is because I had the best-est Jackie I know come and visit!  We had a fabulous time playing nerts, taking care of the kids, eating out, driving around, shopping, and talking.  Lots of talking.  Sigh, it was medicine for my soul.

Out of our soul satisifying converstaion we stayed up way too late one night with TJ (it was perfect) and discussed this question:

If you were given $100, 000 dollars to do what ever you wanted to with, what would you do? You can of course be responsible or you can do something wild with it. 

TJ said he would rent a nice RV and we would load the kids up and GO until we couldn't go anymore.  I love that man.  And yes please!

I will share my answer in a later post because, well, because I can and I am not ready to share yet.  I know...RUDE!

But what would your answer be, I am dying to know!

Tomorrow I turn 33, will this be the year I do something crazy!  ; )

A Ho Hum Kind Of Day

Ho hum. 

It is a beautiful day in the Boise area today.  It rained yesterday and washed away all the yucky in the air so today is sunny, crisp and clear.  The mountains look amazing today.  I also hit a sweet sale at Macy's today and bought not one but TWO pairs of jeans.  Any day a good pair of jeans is found is a good day.  But I am feeling very, well...

Ho hum. 

Once I got home from Carly allergy appointment where today we were treating for Vitamin B complex, yes apparently people can be allergic to Vitamin B.  The doctor accidently treated her for Vitamin C which wasn't a big deal, we just started over.  Well I brought all three kids with me today because the doctor has the cutest miniture Poodle named Sampson that the kids were really anxious to play with.  Sampson wasn't there today.  Since we had to do a re do on Carly's treatment, my sugar high, sleep deprived four year old had quite the show for everyone today.  Urg.

I couldn't wait to get home and rip off these jeans, cowgirl boots, coat and hat and throw on my sweats and a sweat shirt.  I still have to change by the way, I was afraid if I went into my room I might not ever come out!  And the four year old is asleep on the couch.  YES!

As I walked in the house, kicking the things that need to be picked up I am faced with the reality that I have company coming tomorrow and I need to clean the house.  Some days I just want to look at that mess, give it the finger, pop a bowl of popcorn and curl up with a movie. 

BUT, I stopped myself and tried to make a better choice and thought I would vent on here, eat an apple, light a candle and drink some hot tea.

The apple was too mushy for my liking and by the time I actually sat down to write this my tea was luke warm.  See what kind of day this is?  Urg.

After each of Carly's allergy appointments I have to use what we call a "buzzer" to stimulate all of Carly's pressure points every two hours to keep the treatment moving through her body.  She also has to avoid what ever she was treated for for 25 hours.  I didn't realize that vitamin B is in everything.  No really, everything.  So my five year old can eat plain white rice, plain white pasta, fried potatoes and fish.  THAT IS IT.  And water to drink.  Sounds real healthy huh? 

So along with the dirty house I was met with a crying five year old who just wanted some fruit because she was hungry.  And mad because she doesn't like rice.  And she is hungry.  And it is unfair.  All of which I can agree with.  It is unfair that she doesn't get to eat anything while everyone gets to eat what ever they want.  Well I don't, but she doesn't notice that.  As if the food fight wasn't enough for this sleep deprived mama, oh didn't I mention the no sleep?  Everyone has been passing around throw up, fever, and general cold symptoms all week, which means if someone is not kicking me in my bed, they are not tired because they napped all day, or can't sleep because they don't feel good or are throwing up.  I. AM. TIRED.

Ok, back to my griping.  As if the food fight wasn't enough, I was faced with this:

 

Time to fight with Carly's eyes.  I must say, she is a trooper for all she has to deal with.  That pink inappropriate looking thing is her buzzer.  Technically called an acu-stick (as in acupuncture stick).  Thought I would let you see it.  : )  In her contact case is her $170 contact, no pressure to not loose it when I am putting it in!  And her eye patch which she is SUPPOSED to wear everyday for two hours.  We are still working on perfecting that.  She hates it.  Rightfully so.

Alright, I got all that out.  I feel better. 

Tomorrow I am picking up my dearest friend, Jackie from the airport and get to spend three glorious days with her and her beautiful baby #4 still in tummy!  Her other kids are at home in California.  I am so excited for TJ and I to have time with her.  It is the kind of friendship that is like none other and so yummy to the soul.  And I am excited for her to have some time away from responsibility.  The thought of her being here tomorrow is enough on it's own to turn my Ho Hum into a Yippee Skippy!  And I will pull through, because I am a procrastinator and work well under pressure, I will get the house clean.  But even if I don't, she won't care.  And I love that.

It's a beautiful day in the Boise area today!  And it is looking brighter.  Thanks for listening to me whine.  It felt good!